Cancer Treatment Centers of America.

Those Cancer Treatment Centers of America sounds like such a scam to me. You know the ones, with that butch lesbian sitting up there talking about laying on the couch dying and falling out and getting the holy ghost.

Ugh. Her commercial should go something like this.

"I was diagnosed with Stage 7 Lung/Brain/Liver Cancer and the doctor woke me up on the operating table and screamed into my ear, 'You're rotten with cancer and will be dead by sundown!' But I went to the Cancer Spa Center and the doctor said, 'Francine, I don't see it written anywhere that you have to expire before your insurance does.' Seven years later I'm still unloading trucks at my family's hardware store and I've got more lumps than a Goodwill Store pillow, but I'm ALIVE!"